The Colbert Report/Episode/524
Production Info |- |} |- |} Intro Newest Hero * Abraham Carter Gross ** son of Peter Gross * fine print on Peter's contract states the baby belongs to Dr. Colbert ** article H subheading 2 ** follows Article H, subheading 2, which says "skip the next section" * settled by landmark case Snooze v. Lose * ordered Abraham to show up for work wearing his work diaper The Word * privacy is under attack from the press * newspaper published online database of all gun owners in Tennessee town * Tonight's Word: Locked & Loathed * do not put public records in the internets tubes * bureaucrats measure work days in geologic time * Wayne "Puckerbutt" LaPierre * NRA posted info about newspaper employees and threatened them * gun owners are shy (why they wear camouflage) * Dr. Colbert has a healthy relationship with Sweetness ** they go every where together * Dr. Colbert tells his grandmother that Sweetness and he are roommates ** Sweetness is not Catholic * Concealed Permit Permit ** to conceal their permits * have a gun that may or may not exist * like Dr. Colbert's Phantom ** could be semi-automatic ** or a cramp in his finger SEGMENT3 * adjusted bolo tie with a teeny-tiny cow's head * Sliders are made from teeny-tiny cows * Wyoming's at-large ** home to Yellowstone and Old Faithful *** for eruptions lasting longer than 4 hours, see your geologist * first to elect female governor * Cynthia Lummis ** represents the whole state, but lives near Cheyenne * she says it's beautiful * more antelope than people * home of Dick Cheney ** tourists come to see his childhood lair ** people do not try to feed him * wants to have wolves de-listed ** cougar population is very healthy * Cheetah is the fastest animal in the world * voted against Elder Abuse Victims Act ** she is pro-beat up old people ** opposed to wasting money and would like to beat up old people in a fiscally responsibly manner * homeschool advocate ** can't have government telling people what they can teach in their own homes *** Dr. Colbert teaches his children that he invented the light bulb * Wyoming is the volunteer state, show-me state, granite state ** but not the equality state * she was a meat judge ** cannot tell the difference between hog's feet and a hog's foot Interview * Lisa Hannigan ** began singing career at the age of 6; Stephen began screaming career when he was born * first saw her by accident on The YouTube ** like seeing the Dramatic Chipmunk * she had never heard of The Bump * her album is called Sea Sew ** she sews her own instruments * performed: I Don't Know Epilogue * Dr. Colbert has a special message for his new intellectual property: ** sleep tight Abraham; you've got a big day tomorrow! Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Official Truthy Videos * Colbert Nation Home Tube External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments